Infant Massage

Parents: I had a few of you ask me about infant massage, which I don't know too much about, but one of our pediatric physical therapists is a certified infant massage therapist. She gave me some information to share and her contact information in case any of you are interested in learning infant massage for you and your baby. She does individual and group lessons in your home!!

Here are some of the benefits of infant massage:

Massage can be useful for helping calm your baby. Massage can also help with relieving gas, colic and constipation. Massage can help your baby sleep better. Massage can be part of the process of building an attachment with your baby because it encourages eye to eye contact, skin to skin contact and the release of the nurturing hormone, Oxytocin. With parental responsiveness, babies can learn early communication during infant massage.

If any of you in the Boise area want to contact Sima about infant massage classes here's her info.

Sima Tavazoie MPT, CIMT

208-870-9746

Simapt@gmail.com

Thanks for the information Sima!!

Behaviors That Challenge

Parents: Here's information from a handout I created for parents about toddlers and challenging behaviors a few years ago...hope it's helpful!!

Toddlers are at a very unique stage of development because they are between complete dependence on others and becoming independent people themselves. With new skills learned such as walking and starting to talk, we often find that toddlers feel they have to over assert their independence. For this reason toddlers often present with behaviors that are challenging for us. It is important at this stage of development to remember that we must support toddlers in this transition to independence while providing boundaries for healthy growth and development. Here’s how…

Positive Language: Many parents get in the habit of saying “no, no, NO!” during the toddler years. For anyone that has spent time with a toddler before, they soon realize that this word also becomes a toddler favorite. To avoid this “no trap” use positive language instead. Redirect the child to something they can do. Avoid using the words: "no" and "don’t." Many of these words become lost on toddlers because they hear them way too often. If a child is in a dangerous situation say, “STOP” with a serious tone of voice, you can sign "stop" as well. This will give a visual and an auditory cue to the child. If you want your child to listen to you in those dangerous situations, it is very important that you only use that serious tone of voice with them when it’s needed. Again, if they hear a loud, serious tone of voice all the time they will start to ignore it.

Redirect: Tell your toddler what they can do (and, yes, there is always something they can do) instead of always telling them what they can’t do. For example: A child throws something that is not supposed to be thrown. Tell the child “I see you need to throw something, here you can throw a ball.”

Validate Children’s Feelings: Toddlers are experiencing a wide range of emotions, often on a daily basis. When your toddler is happy, sad, frustrated, excited, etc. label those emotions for them to hear. Example: “I see you are really excited right now.” This will allow them to express how they are feeling to others later on when they are able to associate specific feelings with that emotional label.

Give Warnings, Follow-Through and be Consistent: Toddlers are constantly testing their boundaries to learn what is appropriate and what is not appropriate. If a child has been redirected, and continues to present with the challenging behavior, let them know if they do it again they will be all done. If they do it again, take away the item, if there is one present, or remove the child from the situation. If you give in one time, and don’t follow-through, your child will try even harder the next time.

Descriptively Reinforce: Remember to tell toddlers what they are doing well, so the only thing they hear isn’t what they shouldn’t be doing. Instead of saying “good job” which makes you the judge of their actions, tell your child exactly what they are doing that you think is good. For example, “I see you are helping pick up all the toys and put them away”. This allows children to start feeling good about what they have done, and builds their internal cues of what is right and wrong, rather then having to be dependent on someone else to let them know if something is right or wrong.

Stay Calm: Toddler’s that have strong attachments to their parent’s or caregivers, are usually looking to those important people to learn how to act. If you are upset and yelling, your child will be upset and yell. Remember that toddlers are not acting out to make us angry; they are simply trying to learn how the world works.

Dealing with Tantrums: It is very common for a toddler to tantrum, especially if they feel a strong emotion that they do not understand yet. Toddlers need this time to release their emotion in a safe place. If a child is tantruming move them to a safe location (the middle of the floor, on the couch, etc.) and remain close, but do not talk or pay much attention to them, until they have calmed down. This way they do not learn that tantrums get you to pay attention to them. When the child is finished with tantruming, allow them to return to an appropriate activity.

Recommended Readings:

Discipline for Life: Getting it Right with Children, By Madelyn Swift

The Emotional Life of the Toddler, By Alicia F. Lieberman, Ph. D.

Container Babies: What are they, and do you have one?

Unfortunately what serves as a convenience for parents isn't always what is best for their baby. Babies are often carried, or placed in something plastic, just as often, or more than they are being held in their parent's arms or on the floor free to move their bodies. It starts with that lovely infant carrier car seat, that every parent of an infant has. The baby gets in the car seat, is carried to the car, then the car seat goes straight into the stroller or shopping cart, then back to the car. So convenient huh? You never have to actually touch your baby! Then the baby comes home eventually leaves the car seat (unless they sleep in their car seat too, which some do) and they get propped up in their swing, excersaucer or bouncer (with all those "ADD inducers" that I mentioned before). This may sound a bit harsh to some of you, but remember this is the stuff that's being marketed to you. Like I mentioned to you before... this isn't fair to parents, and that's why I'm getting this information out there. So lets start with the impact of these containers on babies' development.

We'll start with motor development. Motor development occurs like this...rolling from stomach to back, then back to stomach, pivoting on stomach, belly crawling, rocking on hands and knees, crawling on hands and knees, pulling to knees, pulling to standing, cruising on furniture, standing unsupported then finally taking those first steps. ALL of these skills are best developed when a baby is horizontal (on the floor) and free to move their bodies, strengthen their muscles and start to move. With so many baby containers available, babies are rarely on their tummies anymore, and of course they are sleeping on their backs due to the Back to Sleep Program. So what we see is babies skipping some of these important steps and moving straight to higher level skills like walking. This creates problems later because essentially the child has holes in the foundation of their development, and each skill isn't as refined and coordinated as it should be. (I promise I'll discuss tummy time more in a future post)

In addition, babies are developing Plagiocephally and Tortocollis because their bodies are in the same position all the time. These fancy terms simply mean a flat spot on the head, and tight neck muscles that don't allow the baby to turn their head easily.

When a baby is upright they get a lot of stimulation, more so than their little brains are prepared for. They become dependent on this stimulation and always want to be upright. This is when parents tell me "they hate tummy time."

So what do we do...

First rule is that car seats are for cars!! If this is too hard for you, you can do what my husband and I did, buy a convertible car seat rather than an infant carrier car seat. This insured that our daughter was in our arms more than in a container. We then both had our baby slings which kept our daughter against our bodies, in a tight, warm space--a lot like the space she had been in for the nine months before she was born! She still loves her sling eight months later, and we use them all the time.

Second rule is don't buy swings, walkers, excersaucers, Bumbo chairs, etc. It might seem crazy to you, but trust me, it's not that hard, and your baby will thank you later when their foundational motor skills are intact since they have had all that very important time on their tummies. We did get a very simple bouncer chair (the Svan Bouncer) which we only used right after our daughter ate and needed to be upright for a moment due to her reflux.

Third rule is to get your baby on their tummy to play. Right now we are saying as soon as the first week after they are born. This doesn't have to be for long periods of time, just often, all throughout the day.

For parents of older infants and toddlers that have containers or used containers, don't get down on yourself. You were doing what you were told was best. Now you can get back down on the floor with your child and play on your tummies. Do lots of big muscle movement activities, like building with big blocks, throwing big balls (think about using items that require two hands), etc. Your child still has a lot more development ahead of them!

See, it's easy to get rid of your containers. It's healthy for your baby, all the space in your house isn't taken up, and you aren't spending a lot of money.

If you would like to read up more on this topic and sensory motor development I would encourage you to get the book Building Babies Better by Physical Therapist Roxanne Small. It's available on Amazon.

Coming Soon: Behaviors that Challenge Us

First Toys: What are appropriate toys for young children??

Poor parents.  It seems like every where I go new fancy “developmental” toys are on display that will supposedly help children learn more, or develop faster. I was amazed as I registered at Babies “R” Us at the list they gave us of everything we supposedly “needed” for our baby.  The truth is that companies that are only invested in making profits are guiding what parents believe is the best way to encourage their child’s development.  So, take a deep sigh of relief, because YOU DON’T NEED TO BUY ALL THOSE FANCY TOYS!  In fact, you shouldn’t.  Most of those toys are actually quite harmful to your baby’s development.

So what toys do you get your baby?  Well, for parents of infants, birth to six months of age, you actually don’t need any toys.  This includes all those swings and bouncy chairs with what I call “ADD inducers” all over them (you know, the stuff that lights up, spins, makes noise, etc. a few inches away from the baby’s face).  The only toy a young infant needs is…you!  You are truly the best learning tool for your young infant.  Your face will teach them everything they need to know those first few months of life.  If you are worried about the idea of not purchasing swings, bouncers, etc, I’ll be addressing that in my next post.

For the older infant, a few very simple rattles and scarves that can be reached for and grasped will do just fine.  Then you can start moving onto other simple toys.  I’ve found, and I often recommend to parents that you look around the house for toys.  My daughter’s current favorites include an oatmeal canister, the lids off her baby food jars, and her diaper wipes containers.  You can save plastic bottles and fill them with items such as rice, tissue paper, water with bubbles, etc. and then hot glue the lids on.  Babies love rolling these bottles around and shaking them to make noise or watch bubbles form.  Of course Tupperware, large plastic spoons or anything else from the kitchen also makes great toys. 

Some of the classics such as shape sorters, pop up pals, stacking cups are all still great.  Just remember think SIMPLE.  The less a toy does the more cognitive process it takes to manipulate and play with it.  This leads to learning.

Here’s the important things to remember about toys:

• Think simple
• Anything that would fit through a toilet paper roll is a choking hazard for a child under three years of age
• Books are always good at any age.  For young infants, they don’t need to look at the pictures, only listen to your voice reading
• Use items around the house, 1. because it’s free and 2. children are already interested in these items because they see you using them
• Rotate out toys every few weeks or so, children get bored with the same things all the time, or if they haven’t played with something for awhile they think of a new way to use it
• Avoid battery operated toys, they usually require little cognitive process and over stimulate both babies and parents

Coming Soon: Container Babies: What are they, and do you have one?

Welcome Parents

I'm so excited to start blogging on the topic I'm most passionate about-young children. This blog will address a wide variety of topics from child development to behavior guidance. Please feel free to comment and ask questions. If anything, I hope this blog will provide parents of young children valuable information that will help them to support their young child's/children's growth and development.

Coming Soon: First Toys; What are appropriate toys for young children??